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Top 5 things I would do if I were U.Va. president

1. Nap days

We all love readings days because they’re a chance to gain back all of that sleep we lost over the semester. But is it really possible to return from full zombie to regular student in a couple of days? I certainly can’t. Instead, I would introduce nap days. These would be similar to reading days in that there would be no classes, but the priority would be getting rest and not studying. Would people inevitably end up at the library or some frat party? probably. But don’t say I didn’t try.

2. Endorse green books

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A lot of people don’t know the difference between blue books and green books, but it’s really quite simple — green books are made from recycled materials. Everything else is the same! Same price, same number of pages and same format. There’s really no reason to buy blue books over green books unless you’re really concerned with the color of your exam booklet you will inevitably throw away after you get your grade back. But maybe all we need to finally realize that green books are superior is a little presidential push.

3. Amend the Board of Visitors

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I truly don’t understand anything about the Board of Visitors. Like, I get that they make decisions for the University and all that, but nothing about it makes any sense. First of all, Board members are appointed by the governor, and Ralph Northam didn’t even attend the University. The members that are chosen might not even have anything to do with our school before being appointed. Additionally, the majority of them aren’t located in Charlottesville, but they keep getting to make big decisions about the University, like raising tuition every year. It’s a totally illogical system in my opinion, so obviously, there would be some changes.

4. Buy a crown

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How will anyone know I am president if I don’t have some sort of indicator? Lots of people wear pantsuits, so dressing professionally wouldn’t help me at all. Sure, people would probably recognize me from the endless media coverage, but where’s the fun in that? Therefore, the only logical and viable solution would be a crown. I’m thinking silver, maybe with little blue and orange jewels as a reminder of which school I rule over.

5. Get some better food

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If you’ve ever read any of my articles, you know I have a little bit of a problem with the food served in the dining halls. Technically it’s all fine, but serving the same under-seasoned options on an identifiable schedule can get a little old, especially for those of us that prefer eating things that taste good. Also, the dining hall workers always look so sad. Maybe it’s the fact that they’re not making a living wage or that they keep making the same thing over and over, but who am I to make assumptions? So who better to make some changes to such a big part of college life than the president?


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